Chapter Four
The Family Prism

Families today take many forms: one parent, two parents, foster parents, grandparents…even great-grandparents are raising children. Aunts and uncles and/or stepparents move in, move out or stay for the duration. Families may include parents as well as children who are gay or lesbian. A family can be as small as two adults sharing a home, or as large as several adults and a dozen children, with three or four generations living together more or less harmoniously.

Communicating with in-laws often presents a range of challenges for the newly created families. In-laws may have different conversational styles and/or speech habits. They may be talkative or very quiet, they may be direct or indirect, they may speak loudly or softly. There will surely be differences of taste, experience, and world views to say nothing of differences in education, religion, culture and socioeconomic status. Political differences may require careful eggshell walking. Each in-law interaction becomes a prism through which the words and behaviors of the now expanded family are refracted. The challenge is to realign past family patterns and create new, more inclusive ones.

Actually, many families may conclude that these new patterns refresh and enrich their lives by introducing new interests, personalities, and points of view, not to mention cuisine.

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